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Friday, October 26, 2012

Building and Tearing Down Relationships

A while back, I heard this story.  From where or who escapes my memory, but the principle remained with me and I wanted to share with you:

There once was a fine architect who could design and build amazing structures.  He would spend years planning and finding the right craftsman to create his masterpieces.  Overseeing every part of development, he would finally begin building.  The entire process would take nearly ten years from start to finish and after construction was complete he would start the tedious, never-ending task of maintenance.  One day a man asked which part of the work was easiest and the architect replied, "Tearing down."  You see, the finest craftsman weren't needed to destroy, in fact, he preferred his breaking crew to be brutal and ruthless.  What takes ten years to build and lifetime to maintain could be reduced to rubble in a single afternoon, but the architect didn't like this part of his work.  Creating was much more rewarding.

You may be asking, "Why is Angela talking about construction in a post tagged to relationships?" and I assure you there is a correlation between the two.  Relationships are much the same as building and tearing down a structure.  To build, they need a sound foundation of respect and trust.  You have to plan and find the best tools to sculpt the camaraderie into something beautiful.  Love can take years to cultivate and a lifetime to maintain, but the benefits can certainly outweigh the labors.  Likewise, careless words can tear a friendship into pieces in the span of a single afternoon.

Baring this in mind, I made a decision this morning--to temporarily deactivate my facebook account.  Lately, it seems like there has been far too much tearing down and not enough building. I have felt myself slipping into unhealthy patterns and I am choosing to put an end to these destructive impulses by eliminating the source.  I want to clarify--this isn't about anyone but me.  I care about every one of you and I hope you will message me within the next few days with your contact information so I keep in touch.  It's been a rough week, and I've found myself reevaluating all aspects of my life.  Right now, I need to trim back and return to the basics again.  In a few months, I will reconsider.  Until then, I wish you all the best <3